A brilliantly vivid New Zealand idiom meaning to go completely wrong, fall apart, or descend into chaos.
A brilliantly vivid New Zealand idiom meaning to go completely wrong, fall apart, or descend into chaos. When a plan, situation, or event turns to custard, it's not a minor hiccup — it's full collapse into a wobbly, formless mess, which is exactly what custard does when you don't follow the recipe. The phrase captures that particular combination of disappointment and absurdity that comes with spectacular failure. Widely used across New Zealand in casual and professional contexts alike.
The event was going fine until the sound system broke and the whole thing turned to custard.
Add your own interpretation of "turn to custard".
Regional slang from around the English-speaking world — British, Australian, Irish, Caribbean, Nigerian, Filipino, AAVE, and the hyphenated-English dialects that make the internet sound local.
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(British) A biscuit consisting of a soft, custard-flavoured layer sandwiched between two crisp biscuits.
(slang, vulgar) Penis.
A comedic British slang term for the penis, relying on the absurdist imagery of combining a dessert topping with military hardware. This is firmly in the tradition of silly, juvenile British euphemisms that achieve their effect through sheer ridiculousness rather than aggression. It's the kind of phrase that turns up in schoolyard banter, crude comedy, and any context where someone prefers a laugh over a clinical term.
British slang meaning to mess something up, bungle it, or ruin it through incompetence or carelessness. Used as a transitive verb: you can "arse up" a plan, a project, a relationship, or just about anything that can go wrong. The phrase is mildly vulgar by British standards but is common in everyday informal British speech. Similar in meaning to "cock up" or "balls up." Delivers a tone of genuine frustration or exasperation.
(New Zealand) To go badly awry.